Even Later
ii.
If the Benefits of Using Words were Tested like Claims aboutResults Typically Achieved with the use of Anti-Aging
Serums and Other Rubs containing
Suspended Vitamins and Blue
Things that might as well
be Jell-O:
Then words would certainly
have best results when
fresh-squeezed and liberally applied
to affected areas.
Newly formed words and sentence
fragments could literally unleash
the power
to slow visible
signs of thinking.
About aging.
Under ideal conditions,
whole-sentences would peel, plump, spritz, lift,
separate, renew, adjust, enhance, and refresh one’s
inner-radiance.
If used as part of a regular
regimen, the right paragraph of words
will very likely
reduce the occurrence
of you
sounding a lot
like you.
64 percent of listeners heard an immediate
improvement*.
In consumer studies conducted by
fairly prestigious independent research
facilities,
some users would undoubtedly experience
randomized selective
deafness, a routinely documented
side effect
of increased word-flow.
If you buy them, more than one Wikipedia
stub, that we can’t find
links to anymore, says
words
should be stored
at room temperature and in rare
instances have been known
to cause unexpected reactions in
persons with physical
attributes.
Which is why
we’ve developed
this one-page
instructional guide
outlining
the order of application†.
Individuals previously diagnosed with thinning
skin and other human
conditions should consult
a communication professional (or drink
a Shot-Ski) before undergoing
prolonged exposure.
*Survey results only verifiable
when using 100% organically certified words
regularly, over time.
Actual results may vary.
†Avoid using in eye or mouth areas.